I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
