I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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