I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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