would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize