What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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