She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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