The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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