fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
