I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
