Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
