Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize
