Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize