okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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