covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
