I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize