I hate all girls vehemently.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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