Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
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