whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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