dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize