oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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