on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
