I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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