I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
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