can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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