remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
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