Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
