I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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