then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Randomize
