is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
