My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
