I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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