you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
false alarm. still invincible.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
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