so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
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I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
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Blow job season was short but glorious.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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