I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
We had sex on a dog bed..
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
