pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
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