I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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