And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Randomize