If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
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