You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Holy sore nipples Batman
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
