Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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