I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
