You're completely useless in the revolution.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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