i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
