Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I enjoy the company of your penis
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