its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I need to align my fucking chakras
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
