I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
