Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize