I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
