I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
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