Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
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