just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Randomize